Got a new Friend called Tabatha:0)

Tabatha Whittle's life
INT:Harley Street Plastic-Surgeons Reception.
Very clean, modern, posh and quiet with a couple of people waiting.
In walks Tabatha, she’s 6ft 2 and carries a Selfridges’ bag. She walks to reception desk and leans over counter.
Tabatha: Literally the price of Prada shoes has crashed. These pairs literally cheap as chips! £180. I doubt I’ll ever wear the 6 inch heels – but so sexy! Is she seeing someone?
Receptionist: Yes, Camilla.
T: OMG The Camilla? Botox I bet? I literally hate botox. She’ll end up looking like she’s wearing a face condom, literally, yuck! [Tabatha Gurns] How long?
R: 5 more minutes?
T: My life literally slipping away, always waiting….

T:No! Just kidding:0) I don’t know how you stand this job? It’s so dead and quiet!
R: I’m pretty lucky to have a job & your mum is a great boss and a fantastic surgeon.
R: Dr Whittle mentioned you were with the Police yesterday?
T: See that? That’s where the police literally handcuffed me! See that, smaller yes – that’s what the criminals did to me.
R:Oh my! What happened?
T:Wasn’t my fault, Yesterday!! OMG Literally attacked by criminals, yeah you heard me right… then I got a roughing-up by the Police. Both of those ‘gangs’, the Criminals and Police literally ripped me, screaming, out the womb of innocence, away from my civil liberties… human rights.
T:I’ve had to block book 2 weeks with my therapist. I am literally suing the Police. Mum will pay for it!

T:I will not let this drop!
R: Oh my!
T: Double Jeopardy Victim.
R: Um
T:All that tax I pay… and it was the Police who literally treated me worsly.
R: -
T: Just got off the phone with Amnesty International! 3 minutes ago Amnesty literally called ME and asked if I was ok. They wanted to film an advert for me, highlighting - Literally to the world my plight!
R: My dad’s in the force.
T:I said thankyou, Amnesty – but I got it covered. Go film the Iranian’s that get stoned and can’t keep their Hijabs on!
T:I swear, if I was born in the USA I wouldn’t be treated like this. Oprah Winfrey wouldn’t allow that in her country.
INT CONSULTING ROOM
Dr Whittle (Tabatha's Mum) is 5ft 2. She’s sat talking to Camilla. We only ever see
the back of Camilla’s head. Between the two women is a large mahogany desk. On top of the desk is a firm plastic mould of a middle age woman’s arse with black marker pen marks around the lower arse cheeks. Dr Whittle fondles the buttocks as she talks.
Dr Whittle: Camilla! You will look amazing! You’ll notice a big difference and have a confidence that the new ‘cough’ will give you, Ahmen sister! Oh but *wink* he won’t realise…

Dr:Well he will notice of course! Notice that your ‘hmm’ looks tight..er and firm..er and has a magnetism, akhem, greater magnetism than it…. your kkkk does now.
Dr:What I’m saying is that he won’t know why or even suspect surgery! No No but, no don’t worry - if he did suspect… he would have to inspect your fffcuh with a magnifying glass…. Yes yes - in order to see my tiny incision scars he’d have to get right into your undercarriage, akhem… y’know down there.. and he’d need a very bright light aswell, and be wearing his best reading glasses, sober.. ha ha.
Dr: But he wouldn’t go to that level of scrutiny, no, not of ones body…. :o(!
Dr: Not that he wouldn’t want to… he loves you!…’Whatever ‘love is’ haa haa… he’d just get so quickly distracted into satisfying another need I’m sure, that he would lose interest fast wwww - oh not lose interest in you and your body... noWAY! He’d just get distracted.. by his burgeoning fruuu yes umm... distracted by the naked ness..
Dr: Yes Yes getting naked is definitely exciting akeh, I love it and you’re yes tttt.. corr lovely, yes
Dr: Don’t worry - for me my attraction to you is purely aesthetic & medical & it’s my job umm….
Dr: Plus I’m married… and it’s not a sham marriage, no we’ve a full, very full marriage phew.. lots of shshsh… But I’m saying in your case, ... not that you have a sham marriage or anything sham... well you will have a sham new arrrr.... but i'm saying with your chap.. y’know for him… Well he loves water colours….akem..
Camilla: - - -
Dr: Yes Yes Right..
Dr: So see you next Monday, 9.30am – nothing to worry about. No food for 6 hours before.
Dr: Yes, the car is waiting downstairs, use the side door – fine fine.
Dr: Goodbye. Thankyou Marm.
Dr Whittle bows slightly as Camilla leaves the Consulting Room.

INT RECEPTION

Tabatha sitting in reception. Alongside a patient.
T: Hi, here for treatment? I know why they call it Rhinoplasty now… looking at your nose – it’s literally like a Rhino!
Patient: I’m getting breasts…
T: enlargements Oh! Bigger boobs yes. Men literally explode around big boobs…. You’ll see, DD!!
P: Breast reconstruction, I’ve just finished breast cancer treatment.
T:…...
T: ...and the nose?
P: No… family heirloom
T: Yes definitely it looms and it's covered in hair…Ha!
P: I like my nose, it’s my dads
T: Tell him to take it back!.... It’s very ‘ethnic’ I like that…
P: Yeah….. my Irish family?
Reception Phone rings
Receptionist putting down phone: Mrs Cooper. Dr Whittle is just tidying up, so if you just take this form and sign here you can go in now.
T: Just a moment – can I nip in? Literally 2 seconds ok?
INT CONSULTING ROOM
On desk sits the life size model of a bum with black marker pen dots and dashes. The Surgeon is washing her hands with her back to Tabatha.
Tabatha smiling, lifts and play with Buttocks.
T:Literally holding Parker Bowels arse… ooh [impersonating Prince Charles] “I wish I was your tampon – lick lick”
Mum: Lovely to see you my little baby, wow your hair, kiss kiss. Why aren’t you working today? It’s a Wednesday?
T:I can’t live, I’m so tatty, literally a tramp. Everyone has seen the clothes I’m wearing a million times, literally a trillion times and I’m so ashamed and everything.
M:How do you get through your allowance so quickly? Two days in and you’ve kkkk
spent £600 that daddy gave you?
T: PETROL has doubled in PRICE mummy!
M:You Taxi everywhere…
T: HELLO! Taxi's use PETROL.
M: Taxi's use ummm Diesel
T: Thankyou mum for that education!
M: I’m quite busy darling
T: That’s it? You’re only surviving child and I get dismissed when I’m clearly distressed?
M: I never had, there was no other ffff - I didn't have any other children
T: but,,
M: Your father used a filter on the camera – there was, there is no twin sister….
M:It’s your birthday soon, is there something special you want?
T: A Barbour coat… just like yours, and this year I only want, literally 1 present and it’s a Barbour coat… and matching shoes…. And gloves.
M: So the same as my navy Barbour ummm, in a size 20?
T: NO – I’m the same size as you… but I’ve literally got such enormous tits – it will have to be 2 sizes bigger than yours.
M: ...size 20.... WELL if you’re lucky you may get it my little ppp princess..
T: But it’s on offer NOW and they’re holding it for me – it’s literally the last one in the country on sale… Just £320… c’mon
M: I’m busy and your birthday’s not for a whole month…. umm
M: Wednesday you help daddy, he needs your support petit pois.
M:How will you take over the business if you don’t know about it? Hmm?
T: He puts me in the back room and shuts the door. It’s literally a prison cell.
M: His office is very nice – it’s plush. Look - go help Daddy. After work, I will come pick you up and if he says you’ve been his perfect little helper then perhaps we can pick up the Barbour?
EXT Harley Street
Tabatha flutters 2 doors down Harley Street to Victory iVenture Capitalist.

INT ViVC RECEPTION
Immaculate skinny, straight haired lady sits behind high reception desk with a blue tooth ear piece. She smiles warmly at Tabatha then her face drops to cool.
Tabatha walks through the building to a tall grand door, she goes through. Inside is an empty office with a high backed chair and huge ‘Apprentice’ style conference table. Tabatha slings her bag on table and aims the coat for the chair – it misses and falls on the floor.
She sighs and walks out to a open plan office full of people busy on telephone calls and typing.
Tabatha wanders over to a good looking young new recruit, she’s flirting.
T: What you doing Firoz?
F: Umm closing a deal on Frankies Asia Net, it’s a 17% stacking up
of..
Tabatha wanders off
T:Dad uuuurrrh?

The owner of the business is Lord Whittle, he’s 5ft8, well built and very attractive, oozing charisma with a practical manner. He’s perched on the corner of a desk addressing 3 members of his successful business. They all look at him with interest and respect. He loves his daughter and hopes the best for Tabatha but he isn’t interested in Tabatha beyond the minimal parenting required.

Dad: Sit with Roanne – go on – deal with the files she’s going
through. ROANNE – give that work to Tabatha, then Roanna – get me a
10/31 on yesterday’s takeover bid? FIROZ - Man you giving a 211 to
Asia Net - Let the good times ROLE homey!
Tabatha sits next to Roanne. Roanne begins to explain the job
//time jump
3 minutes have passed and Tabatha’s nostrils flare with annoyance and
frustration.
Roanne: So that’s how you enter the data.
T: Excellent, you’re literally a database whiz, Bill Gates could learn
from you! So let’s start.
T: This file? Roanne, you enter that detail in. Do it
there. Ok?
R:Um? Ok – well if you actually do it – here or in your office, I
need to speak to Lord Whittle.
T:Tell Daddy “Tabatha nur nur”
J: Pardon?
T: Definitely, you go an speak to my father and I will support you in
doing your job, for you – literally doing this work, your work –
literally here, over there, in my office where I’ll literally work
over there. Yes? Ok?
R: Ok.
T: Coffee? I’m gonna nip to Starbucks.
R:No Thankyou.
Roanne with gritted teeth walks over to Lord Whittle. Tabatha chews a wasp.